I think it comes from the way girls are raised in patriarchal cultures: to adjust, to yield, to step back, to give in, to give up, to efface themselves, to set aside their dreams, to minimize their needs, to not be while being. In the most liberal households, we still learn to tiptoe around men. Around others, really. We mould our days around others.
We are not meant to matter. Not to others. Not to ourselves.
Sensitive to the slightest shift around us, we abandon the promises we may have made to ourselves. That cup of tea after everyone has left the house. The everyday yoga or meditation routine. The promise to write. Something. Anything. Just to know we are still alive.
As we grow older, we are lost in the debris of the promises we have made to ourselves and broken, the detritus of our abandoned dreams.
Reiki practice begins with affirmations that repeat the phrase, "Just for today. " This is a promise we can keep--just for today. Not for weeks. Not for years. Not forever. Just for today, at this moment, I will give myself the gift of.... whatever it is I want or need.
And that one instance is so much easier to pull off, start to finish. One promise, one task, one workout, one sketch, one blogpost... fills you with satisfaction, accomplishment and confidence that if you want, you can do this all over again. And again. Just for once, each time.
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