Thursday, April 10, 2014

Mr. Modi's marital status

So, the big news this morning is that Narendra Modi has admitted to having married Jashodaben, the teacher who has been occasionally interviewed and profiled as his long-forgotten wife. They were married at 17 and stayed together only two weeks, according to reports.

There are three issues with this. First, that he has consistently lied about his marital status. Perhaps having lived together only two weeks, one can grant that he must not 'feel' married. However, that does not change legal reality and the word 'separated' should at least have shown up on previous declarations.

Second, one cannot overlook how tough it must have been for Jashodaben over the years. She seems to have been the iron lady here--getting an education, getting a job, building a life. Based on her interviews, she also seems to have done this within the framework of Indian social norms around marriage, thinking of herself as being married to him. Think of the cruel words and thoughtless comments a woman placed in that position would have overheard and ignored over a lifetime. Her acceptance cannot have numbed the hurt.

Finally, and for me, maybe this is hardest to understand--if you have been married before you were ready for it, if you were so unprepared when you were made to get married that you broke the marriage within a fortnight--then why, when you have power, are you not an advocate for eliminating child marriage and forced marriage? Mr. Modi should feel for this cause very strongly and put his considerable clout behind it. But as far as I know, he doesn't. This would have been a great way to acknowledge his personal reality and use it as an argument to change something that is wrong.

It does not matter to any of us whether a candidate is married, separated, single or otherwise. It should not. But if "it's complicated" because you prevaricate, and if someone pays the price for that, there is a very big problem in my view.

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